Romney Rag [Based on "Splish, Splash"]
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- Rollin through the Trollin
Mitt Romney is so unstable in his public positions that he reminds me of the old Bobby Darin song, Splish Splash. Mitt has tons of money and what seems like a sound personal character, but in political terms he is reeling with the feeling every time he addresses a different segment of the electorate. This is an attempt to acknowledge Mitt’s most consistent characteristic as a political figure. I hope it provokes a bit of a laugh because this must be a joke America has yet to get.
Splish Splash, I was makin’ a dash
Runnin full out to the right Hey bub, just relaxin’ at the club Thinkin’ everything’s sown up tight
Well, I stepped out the club, felt the heat at the door,
I wrapped a smile around me
And I hoped that I would score, and then
Splish, Splash! I broke out in a rash
Well how was I to know there was a party going on
They was a-wishin’ and a-slashin’,
Reelin’ and apealin’, moving and a-groovin,
Walkin’ and a-trollin’, yeah!
Bing bang, I saw the whole gang
Hurlin on my living room rug, bleah! Bip bop, they was doing the flip flop
All the goons had been plantin a bug
There was Michelle –my-Belle with-Rootie Newtie Too
Good Golly, McCain’s Folly was-a even there, too!
A-well-a, Splish Splash, I forgot about the dash
I went and put my prancin shoes on, yeah…
I was a reellin’ and apealin’, trollin’ for the stolin’,
Schmoozin and a choosin, splishin’ and a splashin, yeah!
Yes, I was a-splishin’ and a splashin’
I was a-rollin’ and a-trollin’
Yeah, I was a-schmoozin and a-choosin…woo!
We was a-stealin’ with great feelin’…ha!
We was a-trollin’ for the-stolin’
Schmoozin through the choosin
I live in Allegheny County, PA. I am married and a father of twins. I served in the U S Army and saw hostile fire in Vietnam. When I was in the Army I took and oath to preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States. I have never rescinded that oath. For whatever time remains for me, I will do all in my power to answer the question, "What can I do for my country?" View My Profile
Tags: contortions, distortions, flip flop, Mitt Romney, say anything
This really speaks to me, since I remember the original quite well. Beautifully done, Larry. I’ll give it the full 100, ’cause it’s got a really great beat that you can dance to!
Melody,
I too remember the original. For some reason, it came to mind and the frantic tenor seemed to fit the Willard’s contortions. When I look at and listen to this mannequin, I am repelled.
All that aside, I wrote this on a lark and laughed while doing it,
Thanks for the kind words.
Larry
Very cool, Larry but I will be hearing this song in my head for the next 24 hours! Now you’ve done it.
Cher,
I wrote this in a jovial mood. For some reason, it struck me that Willard’s gyrations and contortions fit well with the frantic tone of this oldie.
I thought it was time to laugh a bit at this talking mannequin.
Thanks for the kind words.
Larry
HA! You’re the Weird Al Yankovic of politics
Jen,
Many have commented that I am weird, but you have taken it to a higher level!
Thanks,
Larry
Ha ha! Love it! You got my toes tapping and my mind snapping at the very same time.
Thank you, Janene!
Toes tapping and minds snapping are my goals.
Larry